Are They Serious? (II)

More from the wonderful whacky world of 'recruitment' advertisements, both from Jobcentre Plus:

Firstly, and here, just to prove that I haven't made it up:

DIRECTOR

Job No:BPS/16682

Wage £6.15 TO £6.60 PER MONTH
Hours 37 HRS OVER 5 DAYS
Location LYTHAM ST. ANNES, LANCASHIRE FY8
Duration Permanent
Date posted 18 March 2011

Description:

'Good communication and telephone skills, need to be I.T. Literature. Will include answering the telephone taking reservations, checking guests in out, general typing and data inputting. Full training is given and work based qualifications are available if required. Shifts are 5 days out of 7 and include evening and weekend work. . . '

£6.15 to £6.60 per month? I would draw your attention to 'need to be IT Literature (sic)', although I'm sure the mistake is attributable to the DWP and not the advertiser.

Secondly, and here:

DISH WASHER/DOMESTIC

Job No:BPS/16519

Wage £6.28 PER HOUR
Hours 7.5 PER WEEK, MONDAY-FRIDAY, 6PM-7.30PM
Location LYTHAM ST. ANNES, LANCASHIRE FY8
Duration Permanent
Date posted 21 February 2011

Description

'Previous experience is essential. Uniform and training/induction provided. Duties will include washing up, clearing tables and any general cleaning tasks as required. Successful applicants are required to provide an enhanced disclosure. Disclosure expense will be met by employer. . To apply ring the employer and speak to either Jayne'

'Previous experience is essential ... an enhanced disclosure ... '. That rules out redundant aircraft designers then, of whom there could be quite a few locally, if the Dynamic Duo don't stop butchering the armed forces with the defence machete. All that for a dishwasher's job.